In Part 1, we covered the definition of mentoring, biblical examples of mentoring, and the benefits of mentoring. In this article, we will discuss how everyone can be a mentor, tips on mentoring, and how to create a culture of mentorship.
I (Joseph) was conducting a seminar in a church when something caught my attention. When the pastor and I arrived at the church at about 8:45 a.m. to get ready for the Sabbath morning activities, we saw one of the deacons with his grandson taking care of all the logistics of getting the facility ready. When I inquired about what was going on, the grandfather told me that on Sabbath morning he goes to his son’s house to pick up his grandson and mentor him on how to become an effective deacon. He said that they both loved doing ministry together.
Then I asked the grandson how he felt about this. He told me that every Sabbath he looks forward to being with his grandfather and going around the church to see what needs to be done. They would keep their eyes open to see if there were any other needs during Sabbath School and worship. They then would stay after potluck to close the building.
The grandfather was also intentional in explaining to his grandson the importance of what they were doing and how this made a difference in the life of the church. He also shared with his grandson his faith, his love for Jesus, and the importance of always walking with Jesus in love and obedience.
As we reflect on this story, this is a prime example of what mentoring is all about: in this case a grandfather mentoring his grandson—or, in other words, a grandfather and grandson doing ministry and life together. When we look at Scripture, this is what Jesus did with His disciples and what Paul did with Timothy, Titus, and John Mark. In fact, Paul admonished the church to create a culture of mentorship in every community of faith (2 Tim 2:2). He also specifically told Titus to have the older women mentor the younger women and the older men mentor the younger men (Titus 2:1–8).
TIPS ON CREATING A CULTURE OF MENTORSHIP IN THE LOCAL CHURCH
Everyone can be a mentor. So often we think of mentors as people who are advanced in age and who have years of wisdom. However, that doesn’t need to be the case. You can be a mentor at any age. For example, a teenager could teach a children’s Sabbath School class and become a mentor to the children. A newly married couple could mentor an engaged couple on how to have a healthy marriage. A more seasoned member of the church could mentor a new believer in the faith by showing them how to worship, how to study the Bible, and how to pray. A Sabbath School teacher could mentor another member to teach. Elders and deacons could mentor the next generation of leaders. In fact, every ministry leader should be mentoring a successor because the real effectiveness of any leader is having a successor.
WHAT A MENTOR DOES
Here are six ways a mentor can benefit the life of a mentee:
1. Be able to communicate your faith, values, and the importance of your ministry. This communication is not only verbal, but also by example. Model positive behavior. Modeling your faith is just as significant as sharing your faith.
2. Listen without judgment. Just as important as sharing with the mentee is listening to them. In doing this you can understand their struggles, hopes, dreams, and questions. They need to see that you are a “safe” person to share with.
3. Be honest, gracious, candid, and straightforward. Help facilitate an open, lively dialogue and give constructive feedback to your mentee. Say what the mentee needs to hear from you, not what he or she wants to hear from you. Whatever you share must be shared with an attitude of love and grace.
4. Show love, compassion, and genuineness. Convey your interest and desire to provide one-onone help and guidance. Be selfless about sharing what you know, recognizing the level of faith your mentee is at. Do not expect a new Christian to be the same as a mature Christian.
5. Motivate and inspire. Support, validate, and encourage your mentee. There will be times when the mentee doesn’t feel like they are making much progress, but this is where your words of encouragement are important to help them see they are making improvements on their journey. When you help link your mentee’s own goals, values, and emotions to the kingdom of God and the mission of the church, the mentee becomes more engaged in ministry.
6. Pray for your mentee. Realize that as you mentor you are working in conjunction with the Holy Spirit. Jesus prayed for His disciples and for us (John 17), and Paul prayed for Titus, Timothy, and his other mentees. We need to do the same.
LEADERS MUST TEACH AND MODEL MENTORING
Church leaders need to be the ones who teach, preach, and talk about mentoring every chance they get. To create a culture of mentoring, it must be in the forefront of every church member’s mind. Leaders also need to model mentoring and share their experiences with the whole church family.
THE BOTTOM LINE OF MENTORING
Mentoring is about taking the time, the effort, and the interest to be involved in the life of someone else. It is not reserved for the mature and seasoned believer; anyone can do it. Mentoring is not complicated, and it can happen naturally as people spend time together. The investment of time and energy in mentoring could very well have eternal consequences.
Joseph Kidder, DMin, is professor of Christian ministry and discipleship at the Seventh-day Adventist Theological Seminary in Berrien Springs, MI, USA.
Tom Grove, DMin, is the associate director of ministry and evangelism for the Texas Conference of Seventh-day Adventists, Alvarado, Texas, United States.
