Supportive social connections have a powerful influence on how long and how well we live. Supportive relationships can come in the form of a spouse, a loving family, a reliable network of friends, or a caring church family. Even a connection to a pet can have a powerful positive effect on one’s well-being. Thus, we conclude our series on “Seven Secrets for True Longevity” by discussing secret number 7: healthy relationships.
Perhaps one of the first studies looking at the link of social support and health was conducted in Rosetto, Pennsylvania, USA, where researchers discovered that the incidence of heart disease in this little town was half that of two neighboring towns, despite the same risks. The difference was that Rosetto was made up of a close, supportive group of religious Italian immigrants. When they maintained a high level of social connectedness, strong family ties, and a nurturing community, they had a lower incidence of heart disease; when the closeness of the community began to weaken, the incidence of heart disease increased to the same level as that of their neighbors.1
Another powerful study on supportive relationships and the risk of death was done in Alameda County, California, USA. It followed more than 7,000 people over a period of 40 years and showed that people who were lonely and isolated were three times more likely to die, while people with many social contacts had the lowest mortality rates. Thus, the amount of social support was the best predictor of good health.2
Part of the benefit of healthy relationships might be due to a stronger immune system. Studies show that people who have more friends don’t exhibit symptoms of colds despite being infected with the virus.3 In addition, another study of an elderly population showed increased immune function with more natural killer cells and antibodies after a weekly visit by relatives and close friends.4 Therefore, supportive relationships may contribute to fewer illnesses. However, the reverse is also true: Negative social interactions and unhealthy relationships can weaken one’s immune system and thus bring about disease. A study has shown that when one is in conflict with a spouse or companion, the immune system is less effective.5
What can we do to reap the benefits of healthy relationships? Here are a few tips:
• Reach out and touch someone. Connect with others with a hug or a kiss when appropriate, shake hands and smile when greeting someone, hold your pet, or volunteer at an animal shelter.
• Be a friend. If you want to make friends, be friendly. Be positive and supportive to those with whom you associate.
• Invest in healthy relationships. In our busy lives we may forget to include time for one-on-one interactions with family members and friends. Consider setting aside a few 10-minute blocks of time this week for that purpose. Let someone know you want to talk with him or her face-to-face, turn off your cell phone, and use these blocks of time strictly to interact with this person.
• Forgive one another. Forgiveness brings healing not only to the person who is forgiven but especially to the one who forgives. Carrying bitterness toward someone for years will affect one’s health in a negative way. The healing process of forgiveness may include setting limits for interactions with “toxic” or abusive people, but it is also essential to pray for these people and sincerely wish them well. We cannot have everyone’s approval, and we must accept that. But we are asked to “do all we can to live in peace with everyone” (Rom. 12:18) and to forgive those who have hurt us in any way.
• Serve others. Studies show that 90 percent of people who volunteer are healthier than others their age. Consider setting a goal of two hours per week to serve in an area you are gifted in and equipped to do. Choose an opportunity that is relevant to you and develop meaningful connections with the people you help. Albert Schweitzer, a theologian physician, said, “The only ones among you who will be really happy are those who will have sought and found how to serve.”
As we conclude this series on healthy habits, we are reminded that Jesus offers us an abundant life (John 10:10), so we can use our physical, mental, and spiritual abilities to the fullest as we serve Him. Invest time in prayer and ask God for the power to follow the seven secrets for true longevity— regular physical activity, healthy diet, adequate sleep, healthy weight, daily servings of nuts, positive outlook, and healthy relationships—so we can “glorify God in our bodies” (1 Cor. 6:20) and fulfill His mission in our lives.
1 S. Wolf and J. Bruhn, The Power of Clan: The Influence of Human Relationships on Heart Disease (New Brunswick, NJ: Transaction Publishers, 1998).
2 L. Berkman, “Social Networks, Host Resistance, and Mortality: A NineYear Follow-up Study of Alameda County Residents,” in American Journal of Epidemiology, 1979.
3 S. Cohen, “Social Ties and Susceptibility to the Common Cold,” in JAMA, 1997.
4 J. K. Kiecolt-Glaser, “Psychosocial Enhancement of Immunocompetence in a Geriatric Population,” in Health Psychology, 1995.
5 J. K. Kiecolt-Glaser, R. Glaser, et al, “Marital Quality, Marital Disruption, and Immune Function,” in Psychosomatic Medicine, 1987.
Katia Reinert is a family nurse practitioner at Washington Adventist Hospital in Takoma Park, Maryland, USA.
